As you can see from Miss B's rather hilarious post(s) below, we ladies are going to a party-thingy. The eternal quest for glamourous free stuff has finally paid off and as long as noone reads the blog too closely, we might just get away with pretending to be cool, hip, with it.
Endless supplies of vodka, vintage clothes to play with like a kid in a dressing up box: all these things I like. Having to decide what to wear, commiting to an outfit, and knowing i'll still like it when I have to throw it on in the office on Thursday night? These things I do not like!
See, I suffer from severe wardrobe anxiety. It's a crazy, irritating self-induced syndrome which means that if I don't like what I'm wearing I won't leave the house. Example? Last Saturday Mr Tor and I were supposed to be clubbing like Gods. We had planned to leave the house at 8ish to hit a few bars before descending on a club all drunk and happy like dancing monsters. Time we left the house? 10. Time we came home? 11.30. See, everytime I took my jacket off I was convinced people were looking at me. My dress didn't look good, my arms looked fat (its a pet hate, and I know it's irrational...), my lipstick was the wrong colour (yup, because i'm this crazy) and it distracted me so much I just couldn't have a good time.
But this Thursday will be different. Oh yes. Because i've been wardrobe raiding, shopping to fill the gaps, convincing myself it doesn't matter anyway, and one half of a free promotional bottle of vodka which is often the way to turn into a happy (and mostly karaoke loving) queen. And as well as all this, I have the greatest weapons in my armour: time to plan ahead and you, dear bloggy friends!
See, I am a lady with questions: important, life changing questions. How should I wear my hair? Which dress looks better? Do my boobs look too big in this? This stuff is bigger than the American elections right now. Oh yes. And only you hold the answers.
Question 1: Hair curly or straight?
With my naturally frizzy hair (thanks mum!) each has its merits. Straight is easier to do, but since when has easy been the fashion-way!
Question 2: It has to be a dress. But which dress?
Some people look rocking in jeans. Skinny jeans, killer heels, slinky tops: the outfit a rock chick goddess is made of. Me? I struggle to find jeans that fit at all, so they either fall of my waist, cling so tightly to my hips they cut of the circulation and they are always, always 2 feet too long. A dress it is then. But which one?
Dress1- the dress I wore to my birthday party. All floral and Luella and boobs. I'm inclined to think not the right kind of boobs? Maybe too much volume and not enough cleavage?
Dress2 - Vintage 80s craziness. I loved this dress when I saw it in Rokit on Sadturday, I nearly bought it, but the bf said it made my bum look massive. Is this a bad thing? Should I be dashing back to pick it up?
Dress3- Simple and Black. If only I had a better picture of this dress, but its having a tear down the seam repaired, and I can't pick it up until tomorrow. Its a simple silk tiered number from warehouse. Is it too simple?
Dress 4- Sophisticated and full of breasts. The title says it all. This "fab frock" from beyond retro covers my arms, shows off my cleavage: both good things. I bought this dress because the bf loved it (Hmm, I wonder why!?)But is the plain black dress thing playing it a little too safe?
Final Question: Leather or fur (Obviously it's faux!)?
They are both "Go with everything" jackets. But which one goes to the party?
So what do you think? Help!! (As the famous Beatles song says)
Much love,
Tor x
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